HOW TO BE SUCCESSFUL IN LIFE Step #5 – PERSIST
HOW TO BE PERSISTENT IN LIFE
WHAT DOES PERSISTENCE MEAN?
You have your passion and you have your plan. Now all you have to do is keep going, step by step, until you have accomplished all the goals in your vision.
Get ready, because the world is going to test you.
The world is going to see how badly you really want your dreams. It’s going to try and break you sometimes. But it will reward you when you overcome its challenges. The question is whether you have what it takes. Do you have persistence?
Persistence is defined as the quality that allows someone to continue doing something or trying to do something even though it is difficult or opposed by other people.
And trust me, you’re going to need it.
OBSTACLES AND DISTRACTIONS
Obstacles and distractions come in different shapes and sizes.
Common obstacles and distractions include procrastination, laziness, friends, family, finances, work, relationships, health, disability, and more.
Some of these distractions come from things or people we love. Life is always a balancing act to make sure others are happy and finding the time to work on ourselves and our vision. But many of us make the mistake of letting the scale tip too far toward the wrong distractions too often, when it’s unnecessary. We place too much importance on them or let them have too great an effect on our minds or too much of our time.
It’s important to understand that friends and family can be distractions, but it doesn’t mean they always are. Most of us will incorporate these things into our overall vision of life success, and so it’s important to take the time to enjoy these relationships and be there for the people that matter. If they’re a part of our vision, they should be included in our goals, and therefore in our plan and schedule.
THE BEST DEFENSE
The way I’m going to explain persistence is different from other ways you might have heard. It’s so much more than just continually trying to accomplish something. I believe that working to achieve our vision is our natural process, but the world creates distractions. We have dreams because we are meant to achieve them.
WHY PERSISTENCE IS IMPORTANT
I believe that persistence isn’t a key, but rather that it’s more like armor. It’s a series of defense mechanisms, protecting us as we walk our path. The road is our plan, the destination is our vision.
We protect that road with walls that keep out distractions: our levels of persistence.
YOUR FIRST LINE OF DEFENSE
Especially against our most dangerous enemy, ourselves. This one may be the hardest to utilize, but I want to start here because it’s very important.
This first level of persistence requires an additional mindset that may take some time to get used to. It’s a way of thinking that makes you understand just how powerful your mind really is. I call this the Comprehensive Mindset.
It does more than just defeat obstacles. It creates an understanding that can also help you find the good in all your decisions, so you’re not always beating yourself up for the ones that don’t lead you where you wanted to go.
The definition of comprehensive is thoroughly understanding with one’s mind; having an extensive mental range or grasp, as of a particular subject or many subjects.
With better understanding comes the ability to make better choices.
To apply the comprehensive mindset, you have to acquire a deep understanding of the problem.
It involves identifying your weaknesses or strengths and then redefining or adjusting your thoughts and actions accordingly.
You have to see the problem, find out why it’s a problem, and then turn those answers back into questions, digging deeper.
See if the reasons you found require you to change the way you think to get over the problem.
If you don’t need to change the way you think, then see how you have to make adjustments to your actions that will remove, heal or fix the problem.
Let your comprehensive understanding inspire new action.
When applying this mindset to counter distractions, we must first understand the distractions and why we let them lead us off-track. It requires us to rewire our minds so that our actions better fit our vision.
I promise it’s not rocket science. Let’s take it step by step.
HOW TO GET OVER DISTRACTIONS
When confronted with a distraction we get so caught up in why we need to push through it and carry on with our projects. But we don’t stop to think about why these distractions actually appeal to us.
We need to understand the things that commonly get in our way. We can gain valuable insight by taking a deeper look into why they exist and how these distractions work.
When you find yourself getting distracted, stop for a minute to analyze it. Ask yourself “Why do I feel like engaging with this distraction instead of continuing with my projects? Why does my mind and body gravitate to these alternatives? What do I get out of hem?” See what answers you come up with and make a note of them.
“Understanding your distractions is the first step to defeating them. Take the time to understand why you even consider them over pursuing your goals. Doing this will help you exploit their weaknesses“
GrindPolicy #18
Remember, your distractions will never bring you more happiness than achieving your vision of life success.
FOR EXAMPLE
Why do we procrastinate? Why do we get lazy when it’s time to work on our goals?
I went through a whole thought experiment that gave me answers. I asked myself, “What’s the difference between working on my stuff or watching some show on Netflix?” It’s a decision I have to make every day. “Why does this choice regularly present itself and impede me?
I found it was a combination of two perceptions.
The first was the perceived benefits that just watching Netflix would give me. It could be mindless, offering some state of rest, along with some instant gratification.
The other perception I found by directly comparing relaxing with a show vs doing the tasks I’d scheduled for myself in pursuit of my goals. I discovered that those tasks felt more like work than like chasing my passion, especially after a full shift at my day job. Well, this made me feel like I needed a break, rather than being excited about making progress.
I know all of us can relate.
To work around this, I had to identify why one activity felt like fun while the other felt like work.
“Our lives are determined by our minds“
GrindPolicy #19
CRASHING AND BURNING
How we think has the greatest effect on our lives.
Throughout our lives, we’re conditioned by society and our minds react to the stressors we experience. I have found that even thinking intensely about our grind can cause us negative stress.
We grew up learning to associate the word work with stress. It’s the opposite of fun. Work often has a negative connotation, something we don’t want to do but must. So anytime we even use the word work or say we have to work on something, we induce stress.
This includes saying things like “I have to go work on my goals.” It sounds more like a chore that’s keeping us from having fun.
When we think about motivation, we also regularly induce a stress response. Facing everything you need to do can be overwhelming. Many people will say that you have to want it as much as you want to breathe. They’ll compare not accomplishing your goals to drowning. Boy, that sounds stressful. I don’t disagree with the idea that you have to really need your goals, but that has to come with a deeper understanding to be truly efficient.
CONSTANTLY FIGHTING
This push of do or die can be useful where necessary, but if we constantly depend on the mindset that we have to grind religiously and work hard constantly, we’ll keep ourselves in a stress-like state where we are going to feel waves of negative energy. If you live like this, it will catch up with you eventually and you’ll burn out.
When everything we need to do to progress toward our goals feels like work, things we think are relaxing or fun will start to look more appealing. Our passions will sometimes require us to do tedious chore-like tasks that are necessary but aren’t quite the activity that brings us joy. When we’re in the midst of these, we get used to not inducing the right mindset and emotional state when we try to work on our passions.
REWIRE YOUR MIND
What if you always perceive your tasks as fun and see distractions as a waste of your time?
Not all tasks will seem like they can be fun, but this practice can help you see them that way.
You can do this by rewiring your mind, changing how you think about the problem.
Start by reminding yourself of how your vision and your passion excite you. You should have no problem with this. You picked them because it’s what you want; it brings you real happiness. Even with your smaller goals, there’s a reason you want to accomplish them, and you already know that doing so will give you some form of happiness and fulfillment.
Practice of associating a feeling of accomplishment, happiness, and excitement with your tasks.
FOLLOW TRUE HAPPINESS
I literally think about how much I want my vision and how happy I am going to be when I have that success. With that, I take the time to mentally fill my soul with that happiness. I enjoy the thought of myself being everything I want to be. Then I apply that feeling to the task at hand.
You will give yourself a feeling similar to instant gratification. When you feel that happiness and apply it to your task, you’ll feel proud to be doing that activity. You will see yourself getting closer to your goal.
I find that this happiness is stronger than the happiness I can find in distraction. In fact, I realize I would induce negative stress if I opt for the distraction instead of my tasks. I know that it won’t ultimately bring me the happiness I’m feeling as I think about my vision of life success. So the distraction starts to feel more like… well, a distraction, which will lead me away from my happiness.
Know that while you can choose to watch Netflix instead, it doesn’t get you closer to your goals. Overall, it doesn’t really do anything for you. Know that a distraction can’t bring you the true excitement and joy of having accomplished your dreams. Once you remember what that feels like, the distractions will begin to lose their appeal.
Look at some accomplishments you’ve had in your life already. Remember how you felt. Start mentally attaching those feelings to your tasks.
HOW TO REWIRE YOUR THOUGHTS
Try replacing the words you use when talking about your passion, goals, or vision. Use words that you would normally use in situations other than work. Like “that sounds fun” or “amazing.” “That’s going to be great” or “I can’t wait to do this for myself.”
Use phrases associated with fun rather than things like “I have to go work on my project.”
Your mind doesn’t automatically shift to a stress mode the way it would when you use negatively conditioned words, even though the activity itself might be the same. This is because you’re already one step closer to reconditioning your mind to suit your needs.
Stop using words like work for a while until you’re comfortable with your ability to feel good about using those words. Only use them when you’re able to redefine them emotionally so they suit your needs without leading to negative emotions and reactions.
Your rewiring is ultimately accomplished when you can use any words you want, whether it’s aloud or in your thoughts, all while understanding what feelings to associate with your actions to lower your negative stressors. This will enable you to have a grind hard mentality more often while being able to keep feeling good and not overstressing your body.
Most importantly, the comprehensive mindset will help you find joy in chasing your passion and vision, even when confronted with distractions.
OVERCOMING YOUR OBSTACLES
Obstacles are different from distractions. They’re not something you can avoid—they’re something you have to overcome. Obstacles can be difficult in that they can be emotional states like depression and more.
You have to apply the comprehensive mindset by understanding how the obstacle impacts your life and your ability to work on your passions, physically as well as mentally. Find the source of the problem and determine why it’s preventing you from working on your passion. What about it stops you? Really hone in on the answer.
“Pain in your life, whether physical or mental, is not a weakness. It is a necessary tool that tells you exactly where you need to learn, adjust, heal and fix things so that you won’t break and your grind won’t stop“
GrindPolicy #20
Continuing with the comprehensive mindset, take the time to mentally rewire things in your head. Discover whether you need to change how you think about the problem or adjust your mind by trying to heal, remove or fix an issue that is bothering you.
REMOVE OBSTACLES
A comprehensive mindset may not always require you to redefine things emotionally so that you’re able to get past them. You may need to remove obstacles from your life altogether. This may be something like a toxic individual who is always trying to use you or hold you back.
For instance, if you’re feeling like you’re not getting things done, you have to figure out what’s bringing you down. Then you also have to analyze it to understand the reasons why it’s bringing you down or holding you back.
For example, if it’s a person who is constantly impeding your progression and they are putting you down in the process, a comprehensive mindset should tell you that emotionally redefining the person or their actions may not necessarily be the right course of action, because it ultimately doesn’t take away the problem—your emotions can’t control someone else’s behavior.
“Without a proper solution, a problem will always find a way to be a problem“
GrindPolicy #21
LET THEM GO
It’s counterintuitive to keep this individual in a place in your life where they can continue to hurt you. Instead, the appropriate answer is to let them go, if not entirely, at least from that position in your life.
When you use the comprehensive mindset to redefine things emotionally, it’s for issues that come from within you.
While you’ll also want to use this mindset for your perceptions of things on the outside, in this case it helps you see what actions you need to take to best solve the problem.
You can never get rid of your own mind, so redefining your perceptions to better suit your needs can absolutely be the best course of action. But you can choose to get rid of negative outside influences.
If that’s a person, the comprehensive mindset will let you really hone in and understand the issue. You’ll be able to see if the issue requires you to change something about yourself or if you have to remove the problem altogether.
HEALING MINDS
A comprehensive mindset also means seeing your problems clearly when you need to heal from something that has hurt you.
Healing is different from redefining or removing a problem. Healing isn’t about changing how you think about the issue.
It’s about confronting a problem, seeing how it hurt you, and taking the time to recover from it. The goal here, the most important thing to remember about healing, is to not be hurt forever. How you heal depends on you and what you’re healing from.
Healing is a big topic, so I’ll be discussing it more elsewhere.
For now, though, just know that healing is about getting your mind right to be able to move forward.
In the same way we take care of our bodies to heal from injury, we have to take care of our minds. Our bodies heal in an effort to get back to their previous level of physical capability. So we have to enable our minds to do the same.
FIXING YOUR LIFE
Your analysis of a problem may lead you to understand that you caused it. The problem is holding you back emotionally or physically, and it’s going to be up to you to fix it.
Maybe it’s a scenario where you have to apologize to someone for your actions.
A comprehensive mindset will let you identify if you need to fix a problem that’s weighing on your mind and stopping your grind.
IF THE FIRST WALL IS NOT ENOUGH
You have the second wall. The second wall incorporates a mindset we discussed earlier in step #1, the Control Mindset. The Control Mindset combined with the above Comprehensive Mindset will further unlock your mind and ability.
“Become the mastermind behind your success by mastering your mindset“
GrindPolicy #22
Remember that you are always in control of your own life. With this mindset, you will have a better ability to judge situations that others may deem are important. Oftentimes, family and friends will tell you why it’s important for you to be there, and so your mind might make you think you don’t have a choice. But you always have a choice.
Your life is in your hands, not the hands of others. Do what you need to do. Recognize when something you need to do is truly important, and reschedule with others if you have to. Explain that you can’t because you have important things you need to do.
Your family and friends should understand this, and if they don’t, they will likely forgive you anyway. The importance of this is that if they’re not helping you achieve success, then it’s very possible they are holding you back. And it’s going to be up to you to see the difference.
“The word no is one of the most powerful tools in your arsenal. Learn to tell people no, so you can say yes to your dreams“
GrindPolicy #22
MASTER OF THE MIND
Use both of these mindsets in tandem to overcome anything. The comprehensive mindset will let you figure out what will make things better and how. The control mindset reminds you that you’re in control of your choices, so in the same way you found yourself in the situation that is holding you back, you can find a way out.
You are in control of your life. You aren’t controlled by outside circumstances or other people. So let your mindsets inspire new actions to help you overcome your all obstacles.
You must overcome your obstacles. But you must never quit.
Life isn’t simple, humans aren’t simple and the things we experience aren’t simple. Obstacles can be traumatic and require deeper understanding. But if you can apply these two mindsets to understand & change your perceptions and take control of the situation, then you’ll have a power most people lack.
This power of being a master of your mindset will see you through to the realization of your vision.
WHAT WILL YOU DO?
What do you do when your obstacles or distractions break through your first two levels of persistence?
It’s time to look at the third wall. This is typically where your mind may be juggling many ideas and trying to get a hold of what you need to do, but your obstacles or distractions aren’t things you can reasonably discharge or delay. You might get anxious or upset about the inability to decide what you need to do. In these circumstances, you can become quite frustrated.
When this occurs, look at what’s happening to your mind. Everything you feel adds to your volume of distress.
In these moments, life is trying to overpower you and knock you down. You can feel your obstacles beating down on you. You may struggle with comprehension and control.
It’s time to start fighting back.
RELEASE YOUR INNER BEAST
This is where you embrace your emotional distress with an emotional answer.
“When the world feels like it’s beating down on you and it’s hard for you to work toward your success, your actions will tell the truth of how much your success actually matters to you. These are the moments where you unleash the beast inside“
GrindPolicy #24
Take advantage of all your feelings—indecisiveness, pain, or anger—and you redirect that energy. That’s when you unleash the beast inside you. It’s you versus the world, and the beast inside you is hungry. Feed the beast that energy and let it loose on the world.
When your choices feel confusing and that leads to anxiety and distress, you need to harness that energy and say “fuck it. I am doing this no matter fucking what.” Let the confusion empower you. Be a monster. Be a beast. Get angry, get nasty, do whatever it takes to be unstoppable.
You need to say “Look, I know all these things are happening, but honestly, I don’t give a shit, I need to do this… and I won’t let anything stand in my way right now.” Say it out loud if you need to.
It’s a no-excuses zone. It takes recognizing that you have something you have to do and it needs to happen today. Not tomorrow or next week, but right now.
“The time to take action and grab hold of your future, will always be right now“
GrindPolicy #25
DEFINE WHO YOU ARE
It is in these moments where your actions will regularly define you. We will often find ourselves in this place throughout our lives. The more often we win this battle the more likely we will be successful.
You have to lock onto your deep desire to win. This battle is where many people fail. When your obstacles are in your face and challenging you, their goal is to get you to fail. If you’re going to win, you have to know that it’s up to you, here and now.
Find motivation from things around you. Maybe you have a video or song that gets you pumped. A person you can speak to. Anything that you know you can reach for that will help get your mind right. Whatever tools you have to help you get through this moment, remember that it’s up to you to take action.
Do what you need to do and feel good about it. Feel proud that you were able to win by taking action toward your vision at this moment. Laugh in the face of the world that tried to stop you.
WE ALL HAVE WHAT IT TAKES
Making your dreams into reality will take some blood, sweat, and tears. Nobody ever said that it would be easy. There are ways to make it easier, like with comprehensive and control mindsets. But life will find ways to challenge you and make you doubt yourself and your ability.
When it does, you have to be able to stand up for yourself, stand up for your success, stand up for your passion, stand up for everything you want in life, and in death, stand up for your legacy.
This is where you find that you are stronger than your circumstances. Your vision has you being successful and happy.
Getting to your vision solves many of your life’s problems that you are trying to deal with. Walking the path to your vision is walking to a place where those obstacles don’t exist. Your obstacles aren’t there in your vision, they are already defeated. Subsequently, the more you work toward your vision of life success, the less room those obstacles can occupy until they can’t at all.
LAST RESORT
This is your last resort in battle, your secret weapon. This is what you need to do when life’s got you backed up against a wall. Dig deep and remember your WHY.
Remember that passion means having unconditional love for your own success.
Where will you be when something you love is in danger? What would you do to protect those you love?
Be there to protect yourself. Be there to defend yourself, your happiness, and your success. Love yourself and your success with everything you have.
Remember your why. Why do you have to achieve success at all costs? How does the situation you’re in now compare to your why?
Remember that your why has to be the immovable object that makes you an unstoppable force.
So in the face of your obstacles, no matter how bad it gets, you’re going to make it. You have no choice, because there’s no way your why would let you ever fail.
This level of persistence is where you may feel like you are not stronger than your circumstances. But it doesn’t even matter, because failure simply isn’t an option. You have to do this for your why. It’s your David and Goliath moment.
Your why is the ultimate all fight no flight response.
WHAT HAPPENS IF I STILL FAIL?
I’ll let you in on a secret. Drum roll please…
We all fail. Failure is a temporary state that just means we aren’t there yet. Failure doesn’t mean the end. On the bright side, there’s no limit to how many times we can fail. We only have to reach our vision of life success once.
We’ll always have moments in our lives where we mess up somehow or endure a setback. We will have the opportunity to make a choice and then choose wrong. We will entertain our distractions instead of our goals and let our obstacles slow us down.
This will happen to all of us.
We can’t drown ourselves in the idea of failure.
It’s important to understand that as humans we’re not machines… we will eventually feel burned out at times.
When you experience a setback, when you feel like you’ve failed, just remember your comprehensive and control mindsets. Use them to analyze your choices and understand why you did what you did. And here’s the important thing: use your mindsets to see what benefit you got from your choices.
THE GOOD IN THE BAD
Remember the comprehensive mindset, helping you find weaknesses and strengths and then redefining or adjusting your perspective. We previously talked about using it to find the weaknesses of your distractions.
Alternatively, even when you feel you’ve failed, you can find the strengths in doing so. It’s important to cut yourself a break instead of beating yourself up.
How did these choices help you physically, mentally?
Sometimes when we’re feeling burned out, an evening of Netflix gives us the mental break we need to stay strong.
Our minds do need to rest, and sometimes putting our projects or tasks down for a little while gives our minds the space they need to turn over a problem and find a solution. Keeping in line with the control mindset, accept your decisions, and assure yourself that you’ll be picking up from where you left off as soon as you’re ready.
It’s so important to not beat yourself up over anything you might consider a failure. If you fail, it doesn’t mean that your why isn’t important. Embrace the decisions you made and find the good in them. Then make the commitment to get back on your grind. There is no true failure unless you give up.
THE GREAT TRUTH
We all fail at times. But the war isn’t over.
The world knows that your journey to success is a long drawn out war. And it will fight you along the way.
We may win the battle today, but we didn’t win the war until we have reached our vision of life success.
This is why we need persistence.
“Persistence is a gateway to consistency. Consistency is your success being realized piece by piece“
GrindPolicy #26
The true method for success is consistency.
Being consistent with your grind means you’re making progress toward your goals as effectively as the best of your ability allows. This leaves room for errors or anomalies. As long as you pick up where you left off, you can continue being consistent.
Consistency starts at half your time. If you’re doing what you need to do more times than you are not, you’re making meaningful progress.
“Success doesn’t come overnight, but it does move at the rate of how consistent you are“
GrindPolicy #27
Consistency is what separates the people who will see their dreams come true from the people who will just continue dreaming.
Life will knock us down at times, but it’s all about getting back up. Consistency is getting back up and doing what we need to do at every opportunity we can. Yes, hardships will come, but they will also pass. We only truly fail if we give up.
CONCLUSION
Be persistent with a comprehensive mindset. Analyze your distractions and obstacles to understand why they get in your way. Understand the deeper meanings behind why you want to entertain them in order to see their weakness. Rewire your mind by redefining your distractions and obstacles emotionally in order to help defeat them. Understand if you need to fix a problem, remove it from your life, or heal from trauma.
Use your control mindset to claim control of your decisions, whether good or bad. Realize and accept that you are in control. Don’t cede that control to outside distractions, obstacles, circumstances, or people. Take full ownership of your life. Learn to say no to everything else so you can say yes to your dreams.
Unleash the beast inside and fight for your vision of life success. Fight for all your goals and dreams. Do what you have to do to make progress and don’t let life’s obstacles or distractions get in the way. Crush them.
When nothing else is enough, remember your why. The absolute reason why you must have your dreams come true. Whatever you’re going through, is it ever more important than your why? If it isn’t, then you know you have to keep going.
The war is not over until you win. So even if you fail, get back up and keep going. Be consistent and never give up. Somebody who keeps carving into a mountain will eventually cut right through it. This is the truth of the world.
